The Way to Be a Good Listener

As a caregiver, I believe that the toughest part and the one which was able to push me over the border, were that the INSULTS and poor language they used if they had been in a terrible mood – especially if it had been directed at me personally. Though they might not see the significance of these words they say they still say. It hurts your emotions and makes you super angry. How does it not? You are only human. Having said this, occasionally keeping your cool, while they’re having a verbal collapse or else they are not able to deal with their daily life, may mean the difference between a fantastic day or a horrible moment. Below are a few tips that I have heard and shared with other people I am training that has attracted attention.

I went to a basketball match and was fortunate enough to have some fantastic seats close to the courtroom. As I watched those huge human beings (who made me feel like a hobbit) play with the game, I could not help but notice that the quantity and degree of insults those players were becoming, not just in the fans but by the other players too. I could not think how they can only stand there and accept all that verbal abuse rather than FREAK OUT!
I started to look into it further and discovered that many pro athletes can simply shut out the sound and concentrate on their occupation. . Well, if that is where you are going for this, you are confused. You’ve got a job to concentrate on also. When you are in the midst of a collapse you need to determine what led to the collapse and how can you fix the issue so the meltdown doesn’t continue or escalate. From what we understand about children with Fetal Alcohol is the fact that meltdowns happen when these children are overwhelmed. Take for example what is happening to me now as I write this. My man(among those young guys I use) is calling me every name in the book and telling me he will take me outside, etc. Now I have two choices: 1. I am able to freak out and passion verbal opinions back, which might only turn this afternoon to pure insanity OR 2. While my man is blowing off steam with his brilliant language I will try and determine why he’s so angry. In cases like this, he wished to have a rest from cleaning his room and move out. Which needless to say I don’t have any issue with, understanding his level of operation. As we are going to depart he places sandals on – actually?

I inform him that wearing heels isn’t a fantastic idea as it is SNOWING outside. Well, this wasn’t the response he was seeking. You may see his entire face change in another (my man kinda reminds me of an Adam Sandler Character who will transform from being super fine to some mad rage in moments). Here’s what the difficulty was: his psychological cup was complete from attempting to wash his room AND the other day that he said his sneakers stink (which can be correct, he never wore socks so that it could find a little cheesy). The point is when I was not able to concentrate when he began to get angry I could not consider a appropriate intervention for this specific circumstance. Therefore, such as the expert athletes, this can be ‘our game’ as health professionals.

Look, regardless of what people tell you, caregiving for someone with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder may be among the hardest jobs on the planet; it may also be among the most rewarding. I am not stating that they constantly make you need to push your car off a bridge – those are only some suggestions which might assist you once you’re feeling as if you’re going towards the bridge. A good deal of individuals aren’t ready or had no clue what they where registering for if they began living, working or caring with a person with FASD. If we are able to fine tune how we cope together and understand that if they’re having a meltdown it’s because of their inability to comprehend what is being asked of them, we’ve got a better prospect of earning certain that they are secure and effective. The faster we detract out of our anger – the faster they’ll detract from theirs.